Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Three things I hate about Fordham:

3) Theatre majors:
-The ones that don't do musicals think that they are the bohemians, yet the elites of the college, believing that it exists purely for the betterment of their careers. They think that they are all some kind of tortured, Poe, Wilde, Fitzgerald types, and utterly hate the kids that do musicals.
-The one's that do musicals are delusional, thinking that they are going to be some Broadway star just because they got the lead in their high school musicals. They run around singing annoying showtunes and songs from Aladdin and The Little Mermaid. They all get angry and end up transferring.

2) Honors students:
-All 20 of them think that they are better and more intelligent than the rest of the school, simply because they get to sit in a classroom boasting crown molding and walls with oak paneling. They think that everyone else is so stupid, that we need their assistance to do such tedious tasks as tying our shoes or flipping on a light switch.

1) Dance majors
-They're just crazy. They make fun, purposefully within earshot, of those that are not as skinny as they, perhaps somehow trying to justify their bulimic tendencies. They girls are bad, the guys are worse. When they're not doing coke, smoking pot, or having sex with one another, they're busy having swimsuit parties, taking thousands of photos of their wonderful selves, talking about how everyone at Fordham is so fat, and stuffing their faces with all manner of the edible, only to vomit it back into the toilet, (making sure to weigh themselves before and after), only minutes later.

(As a note, the freshman theatre majors are pretty cool, and Chris Geary really is a reflection of a tortured Poe.)

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